Morning Greetings From Above

This morning, the short period before I woke up has been the most amazing time of my life for the week.

A little background:

For the past few weeks, I felt as though I was walking alone. I was here, God seemed near me, but not with me. I know from the Bible that God is definitely with me, for the Bible says God lives in His children - yet my heart was somewhat far from God. It is a lonely and purposeless feeling, I am no longer confident in things I do - for the very simple reason that I no longer get the assurance that my Heavenly Father approves of it.

I make friends, I write, I speak words, and I live day by day without a deep assurance that I am approved by God. I used to be living with that approval - yet somewhere along the line I lost it. I can easily recount how I slowly neglected that approval and no longer sought it. When I first lost sight of it, I did not quickly run back to God - the Love of my Life, yet I slowly crept into independence. The nice word for being lonely in my soul. It is killing me.

Until I got sick 3 days ago. It is already bad that I am alone deep within. Now I cannot even go out as freely as I want. I tried to read a little, it doesn't work, I try to pray a little - it only gets harder and harder. My heart has been messy, and the things of God had little appeal for me. Until this morning -

Around 8 a.m.

I do not know whether I was thinking or whether I was dreaming about random things which I don't even bother remembering ( I tend to remember most of my dreams ) - out of nowhere, my mind just popped out "Jesus Christ". I did not try to shrug it away, I was surprised even as my eyes were tightly shut and I was in a dreamy mode. I continued on with my previous thoughts after the "Jesus Christ" thought subsided. After a few seconds, the thought "Jesus Christ" came again. This happened for about 5 minutes.

Although I am no expert, there have been many instances in life where there will be interesting things that God does quietly in my mind that I really appreciate. A reminder of His presence coming through my mind happens once in a while, but I did not expect it this way. Then I fixed my mind on that thought and pondered. Very quickly, my mind recalled a passage that I read only yesterday, Isaiah 53 - one of the many prophecies 700 years before Christ was born.

Isaiah 53

Who believes what we've heard and seen? Who would have thought God's saving power would look like this?

The servant grew up before God—a scrawny seedling,
a scrubby plant in a parched field.

There was nothing attractive about him,
nothing to cause us to take a second look.

He was looked down on and passed over,
a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand.

One look at him and people turned away.
We looked down on him, thought he was scum.

But the fact is, it was our pains he carried—
our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us.

We thought he brought it on himself,
that God was punishing him for his own failures.

But it was our sins that did that to him,
that ripped and tore and crushed him—our sins!

He took the punishment, and that made us whole.
Through his bruises we get healed.

We're all like sheep who've wandered off and gotten lost.
We've all done our own thing, gone our own way.

And God has piled all our sins, everything we've done wrong,
on him, on him.

He was beaten, he was tortured,
but he didn't say a word.

Like a lamb taken to be slaughtered
and like a sheep being sheared,
he took it all in silence.

Justice miscarried, and he was led off—
and did anyone really know what was happening?

He died without a thought for his own welfare,
beaten bloody for the sins of my people.

They buried him with the wicked,
threw him in a grave with a rich man,

Even though he'd never hurt a soul
or said one word that wasn't true.

Still, it's what God had in mind all along,
to crush him with pain.

The plan was that he give himself as an offering for sin
so that he'd see life come from it—life, life, and more life.
And God's plan will deeply prosper through him.

Out of that terrible travail of soul,
he'll see that it's worth it and be glad he did it.

Through what he experienced, my righteous one, my servant,
will make many "righteous ones,"
as he himself carries the burden of their sins.

Therefore I'll reward him extravagantly—
the best of everything, the highest honors—

Because he looked death in the face and didn't flinch,
because he embraced the company of the lowest.

He took on his own shoulders the sin of the many,
he took up the cause of all the black sheep.

A big part of me was still musing on the joy that God penetrated my mind and told me in a tangible way of His remembrance of me. There is no one who is a Friend like Him.

Yes, I have 1 or 2 friends that I will share everything with. I have different friends who will always be there to help me out with menial looking tasks. I have some friends who is willing to listen to some discoveries I have about different issues in life.

But none is like God. He dares to be silent. He knows that I trust in His Love - therefore His silence grows my trust. At different times, He speaks a word of comfort. At other times, He just lets me know that He is there. He sees all, knows all, and hears all. I find Him in the most insignificant jobs, I know He is there backing me up in the spotlight. He rejoices and He cries with me, yet He is One that can view all these in perfect perspective and not to be swayed away by a moment of emotions. Whenever everybody has left ( or I'd rather handle things on "my own" ), I know that there is always more than one left, because He is faithful to be with me through thick and thin.

This morning has renewed my vision, I seem to be getting a grip on a proper perspective in life again - like I used to when I walked with my God. Jesus - though a man of sorrows, nothing in his appearance attracted others, wounded for the sins of others, crushed and nailed on the cross, having others misunderstand that He was dying for His own sins - yet He counted it all worth for the joy that God has prepared for Him.

I like that communion. I got a glimpse before. The assurance from heaven, to walk upright and to know that God is on our side. To know that God has plans not to harm us, but to give us a hope and a future(Jeremiah 29:11). God is Love (1 John 4:8).